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Thread: Confidence issues

  1. #1

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    Default Confidence issues

    Hey guys, as some of you may know I have been drumming for 4 years and am getting better everyday as we all are. Ever since my drumming career has started I have had 1 huge huge huge issue, i just can't get over it, and I want to fix it fast. The problem I am having is a confidence issue, when i play by myself in an isolated environment I seem to play at my best. But when you ask me to play in front of people I kinda try and find a way out of it because I'm afraid of what people are gonna think of my drumming skills and if they are gonna like it or not. But the problem is when I do ay in front of people and they do enjoy it, it makes me feel good. The question I'm always asking myself is "why don't I have the guts to perform?" I mean I know I'm a great drummer but......I dunno like I said I don't know what people will think of me. But if I don't play to a crowd at all people will think I'm an awful drummer. All I'm asking is for some advice on how to overcome my fear. Cheers guys
    CURRENT SETUP-
    Sonic Drive 7 piece kit.
    2 up 2 down

    - Sabian AA Holy China 17"
    - Meinl classics custom extreme metal crash 18"
    - Sabian AA 16" crash
    - Zildjian Z custom 20" ride
    - Evans G2 heads
    - Pearl Demon Drive Double Pedal
    -Joey Jordison signature snare drum.

    Drummer For: *BAND HAS NO NAME YET*
    Genre:Metal/Screamo

  2. #2

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Play in front of friends and family first. Also, maybe video tape yourself playing so you can take a look at yourself playing. You may see that you really are good and it will boost your confidence enough to allow you to overcome your fears of playing in front of an audience. If after viewing yourself on tape you find that maybe your aren't as ready as you thought you were to play in front of people, then at least it will give you the feedback to work on some things to get you to the point where you feel that you are ready.

  3. #3

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    That's what I have been doing lately but I dunno I've played in front of my class mates before and they all loved my playing I just don't know why I can't do it again. It's like im afraid I'll stuff up and I'll be humiliated. Do you suggest I make videos of myself and show other people and then build up enough confidence to show people what else I can do.
    CURRENT SETUP-
    Sonic Drive 7 piece kit.
    2 up 2 down

    - Sabian AA Holy China 17"
    - Meinl classics custom extreme metal crash 18"
    - Sabian AA 16" crash
    - Zildjian Z custom 20" ride
    - Evans G2 heads
    - Pearl Demon Drive Double Pedal
    -Joey Jordison signature snare drum.

    Drummer For: *BAND HAS NO NAME YET*
    Genre:Metal/Screamo

  4. #4

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Lucius, confidence comes with experience..as long as you keep the beat going, enjoy what you are playing..I mean really show your love of the song...all else as they say will come.
    Enjoy the Music!

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  5. #5

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Yeah thanks for your help guys. I would love to make a career out of drumming as I am only 14 and have a while to go. But as you guys said, loo at yourself play. I have been doing that but I seem to put whey to much pressure in myself. Like people say i could go places but I seem to think I'm not good enough to get that feeling and satisfaction of pride and achievement when I play.
    CURRENT SETUP-
    Sonic Drive 7 piece kit.
    2 up 2 down

    - Sabian AA Holy China 17"
    - Meinl classics custom extreme metal crash 18"
    - Sabian AA 16" crash
    - Zildjian Z custom 20" ride
    - Evans G2 heads
    - Pearl Demon Drive Double Pedal
    -Joey Jordison signature snare drum.

    Drummer For: *BAND HAS NO NAME YET*
    Genre:Metal/Screamo

  6. #6

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    not all drummer are born to be a showman
    the more you play in front of pople the faster you will get use too
    we call that experience
    and try tolearn when it goes bad intead of been humilate
    you are on the good track just by asking
    good luck

    R.i.P. FRANK YOU WILL BE REMEMBER AS A GENTLEMAN

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    FRENCHY

  7. #7

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    Wink Re: Confidence issues

    I had it way worse than you Lucuis! I could not even muster the guts to play in front of my own parents at first! I was super critical of my playing and being shy also didnt help.One day after playing on a friend`s set he said,"hey,you are good" and even though it made me feel good,it was quite a while before I believed in myself.

    My advise is dont worry about what other people think.I struggled with peer pressure in school as I was from another town because our school burned and everything and everyone was new to me.You just have to realize that there are others that are better and others that are worse than you in playing and that the most important rule is to HAVE FUN and keep trying to improve.

    My worrying caused me to make mistakes and when I would get mad at my mistakes,it would cause me to make more mistakes,which is real noticeable.If you do the best you can and not worry about it,you will find you make far less mistakes.In time you will learn to keep playing without thinking about it and to tell you the truth,many people will never know you even made a mistake!

    The best there is had to start from scratch too.Just be confident and happy with where you are in your playing ability for now.It doesnt come overnight,but you get out of it what you put into it.Have faith in yourself and before you know it you will be free from the chains of worry which can hold you back.Just say,"I am good,I am not album material but I am not done yet either.If I was totally uncoordinated,I would have probably quit by now."
    WATCH OUT NEIL PEART,HERE I COME!!!

    P.S. Before I play for an audience I always get some jitters but when I start to play I forget all about the nerves and enjoy the music.As others have said,after a while,playing in front of an audience comfortably will come after doing it over and over.
    Last edited by LudwigLifer; 08-02-2011 at 02:05 PM.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    T.C.

  8. #8

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Try recording a couple of covers on youtube. Your just showing people you don't know, so its not as stressful, but as you put more up and get better/get better responses you'll build up confidence towards showing off infront of people. I also recommend having a little solo or beat ready to start you off with if your ever asked to play, cause I always hate being asked to play and sitting there thinking "What the hell do I hit..."

  9. #9

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Quote Originally Posted by Lucius-Borich-JR View Post
    Yeah thanks for your help guys. I would love to make a career out of drumming as I am only 14 and have a while to go. But as you guys said, loo at yourself play. I have been doing that but I seem to put whey to much pressure in myself. Like people say i could go places but I seem to think I'm not good enough to get that feeling and satisfaction of pride and achievement when I play.
    You're young, so give it time. I'm sure most teen drummers have had similar experiences. As many have already said, confidence on stage comes only from experience whether you start at 10 or 40. Many of us have been playing in front of people for a LONG time, and we certainly didn't have the confidence when we started out.

    You need to play in front of people as often as possible, and also with other musicians. Nothing helps you develop as a musician than playing with other musicians, and particularly people better than you are.

    You also have to remember that the drum part is "yours". Don't worry about "mistakes" as you are the only one who knows it isn't what you intended, and don't "overplay". The more you focus on the song, rather than you're drumming, the more relaxed you'll be.

    PM Yohin. He can give you some great advice. His drumming has dramatically improved in the last 2 years, and part of that has been playing in a band or two, and attending "rock camps" where he got to perform with adults.
    Jesse

    1986 Tama Crestar - Lacquered Piano White
    2016 Roland TD-25K
    2015 Tama Starclassic B/B - Indigo Blue Sparkle

  10. #10

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Good afternoon, Lucien...
    I realise that your youth should encourage me to be more lenient in replying to your questions; once again, my apologies in advance if I come across too harshly. My intention is not to belittle you or hurt your feelings.
    I would, however, take issue with your statements (which, by the way, smack of self-confidence..!) such as "...Ever since my drumming career has started ..." and "...I know I'm a great drummer...". You are, indeed, on the right road, and with persistence and decent effort will doubtless become "great". I don't wish to take away from your hard-won progress, but please allow me some small doubt as to the absolute level of your ability. When 'working out', practicing, going through the rudiments and exercises, I'm sure that your level is at least reasonable, and improving, but perhaps not (yet...) "great". That being said (I repeat, no malice intended on my part...), I would doubt even more any prospective audience knowing much about your technical potential. What matters more is, imho, a good solid beat behind other reasonably proficient players. In my present band, one of the numbers that go down best is 'Highway to Hell' (no introduction needed, I hope...) in which the drums play an important role of keeping out of the way of the guitar heroes and singer, pinning the whole thing down. I would suggest that it is songs of this ilk which would be best to play before an audience; one can hardly go wrong (given at least some proficiency and decent rehearsal...), and the audience appreciate the perceived talents much more than an 'almost perfect but not quite' high-flying number from Peart or whoever. There's a great deal of humility involved in becoming a 'great' drummer.
    It should be understood from the outset that, in any case, things can, and will, go wrong one day; probably through no fault of yours. The podium gives way, a cymbal stand gets knocked over, a power cut... all these things and many more become amusing anecdotes later, but one has to put all sorts of potential momentary ridicule into the equation when going before a public. How does one handle these things..? Mostly, badly, at first, but with more and more good grace as experience builds. Just be glad for each occasion when all goes well (yes, that happens too..!).
    One last word..? If you would like to experience the (apparent...) ecstasy of bungee jumping, sooner or later you have to get out on the ledge and jump..! The thrill of overcoming the natural apprehension is the very reason for doing so. The cure is difficult, but simple. Make sure that all the preparations are as best as possible, then jump..!
    Don't even think about what anyone would say, either because you play, or because you don't play. Decide for yourself, and assume your decision. You'll do at least as well (could be much better, never know...) than we have all done, and many others besides. The recipe is easy... 'The answer's a lemon; suck it and see...'
    Hope this helps...
    Have a nice day.
    Dad3353 (Douglas...)

  11. #11

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Wild idea here: How about dragging your kit on some city sidewalk and go at it... until someone put a few coins in the tip jar!
    - poodlesdrum
    Could someone get this George Orwell fellow on the phone, please...!

  12. #12

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Lucius, I understand what you are saying here, because I am my own worst critic too. When you perform, though, it becomes a handicap. You will have to let go of some of the self-criticism and realize that the audience does not have the expertise on drums that you have (only other drummers will know, and many of them will give grace because they've been there).

    Personally, I know how far I've come, but I still push myself, because I am not satisfied, and that's good because I won't rest where I am. I learned about performing when I have played my guitar and sung solo before churches. It was intimidating at first, and when I made a mistake, I was embarrassed. The truth is that the people didn't notice, or they didn't care. They simply enjoyed the song that was performed.

    A wise psychologist friend once told me, "If you are worried about what others are thinking about you, then you have too high an opinion of yourself. Most people are too concerned with their own lives to be thinking about you." I have never forgotten that, and when we are playing drums with other muscians, most people will be into the song, not the musicians - only other musicians do that.
    Quoting gonefishin: Just have some bacon with ya when you go pick her up..........youre an instant chick magnet.





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  13. #13

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Practice builds confidence.

  14. #14

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Thanks again guys, maybe your onto something there pastor bob. I haven't actually thought of that, I suppose when I got out there and drum people will only be thinking about what their doing, and when the song is finished they might actually like it. I mean people aren't gonna think 24/7 of how much mistakes I've made and if I did well or not are they?
    CURRENT SETUP-
    Sonic Drive 7 piece kit.
    2 up 2 down

    - Sabian AA Holy China 17"
    - Meinl classics custom extreme metal crash 18"
    - Sabian AA 16" crash
    - Zildjian Z custom 20" ride
    - Evans G2 heads
    - Pearl Demon Drive Double Pedal
    -Joey Jordison signature snare drum.

    Drummer For: *BAND HAS NO NAME YET*
    Genre:Metal/Screamo

  15. #15

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Quote Originally Posted by Lucius-Borich-JR View Post
    Thanks again guys, maybe your onto something there pastor bob. I haven't actually thought of that, I suppose when I got out there and drum people will only be thinking about what their doing, and when the song is finished they might actually like it. I mean people aren't gonna think 24/7 of how much mistakes I've made and if I did well or not are they?
    Nah, people want to see a band having fun, so they can have fun. Smile, be prepared, and it will all be good.
    Quoting gonefishin: Just have some bacon with ya when you go pick her up..........youre an instant chick magnet.





    For coupons and specials, join the Drum Bum mailing list.

    Buy Gifts for Drummers. And don't miss the free Drum Lessons!

  16. #16

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Unless the band points out the mistake by stopping, or shooting each other dirty looks the audience will probably never notice.

  17. #17

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    I know what you mean. I usually don't in front of people often at all (excluding the fact that my parents can always hear my drumming ). Maybe next time you play in front of people, start with something simple. That way, they will (hopefully) compliment you, and then your confidence builds up, and you can go on to the more fun stuff Just my two cents.
    “The beautiful thing about learning is that nobody can take it away from you.”
    -B.B. King

  18. #18

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Quote Originally Posted by Lucius-Borich-JR View Post
    Hey guys, as some of you may know I have been drumming for 4 years and am getting better everyday as we all are. Ever since my drumming career has started I have had 1 huge huge huge issue, i just can't get over it, and I want to fix it fast. The problem I am having is a confidence issue, when i play by myself in an isolated environment I seem to play at my best. But when you ask me to play in front of people I kinda try and find a way out of it because I'm afraid of what people are gonna think of my drumming skills and if they are gonna like it or not. But the problem is when I do ay in front of people and they do enjoy it, it makes me feel good. The question I'm always asking myself is "why don't I have the guts to perform?" I mean I know I'm a great drummer but......I dunno like I said I don't know what people will think of me. But if I don't play to a crowd at all people will think I'm an awful drummer. All I'm asking is for some advice on how to overcome my fear. Cheers guys


    The best way (and only way), you are going to overcome this is by playing in front of people.

    I lost a stick, well, didn't lose it, they hit together when I was doing some cross-sticking, and 1 stick wound up in the middle of the dance floor. I grabbed another stick and went back to it, nothing else I could do. After that, I never was nervous again, and, never dropped another stick on stage.

    If you want to be a working drummer, at some point you will have to play in front of people.

    Pick any 1 of my videos on drumchat and watch it. There will be at least 10 mistakes in it. Some minor, (hitting rims) some really big, (like missing drums or almost knocking my floor tom over). I don't like it, but I accept that it happens.

    Every musician makes mistakes. They deal with it and move on. I saw Buddy Rich drop a stick. Get out there and play, if you make a mistake, which you will at some time, move on. The longer you put it off, the harder you make it in your mind.

    Go play, have some fun.

  19. #19

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Ok I have a class band lesson in Monday I'll play then. Do you think when I play next week I should play a basic beat then after a couple of weeks I should put some solos into it. Or should I put some fills in straight away?
    CURRENT SETUP-
    Sonic Drive 7 piece kit.
    2 up 2 down

    - Sabian AA Holy China 17"
    - Meinl classics custom extreme metal crash 18"
    - Sabian AA 16" crash
    - Zildjian Z custom 20" ride
    - Evans G2 heads
    - Pearl Demon Drive Double Pedal
    -Joey Jordison signature snare drum.

    Drummer For: *BAND HAS NO NAME YET*
    Genre:Metal/Screamo

  20. #20

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Quote Originally Posted by Lucius-Borich-JR View Post
    Ok I have a class band lesson in Monday I'll play then. Do you think when I play next week I should play a basic beat then after a couple of weeks I should put some solos into it. Or should I put some fills in straight away?

    I don't want to tell you how to play in that situation, but, if it were me, I would play it as I felt it at the time.

  21. #21

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Quote Originally Posted by Lucius-Borich-JR View Post
    Ok I have a class band lesson in Monday I'll play then. Do you think when I play next week I should play a basic beat then after a couple of weeks I should put some solos into it. Or should I put some fills in straight away?
    Good morning, Lucien...
    A guiding rule could be: if it's a group practice session or public performance, play what the music requires. If it's a group lesson, play what the teacher needs/requests. If it's your own practice time: play as perfectly as possible (allow no errors, zero tolerance...).
    In all cases: make sure that it's fun for yourself (and all others involved...).
    If in doubt: less is more.
    Hope this helps...
    Have a nice day.
    Dad3353 (Douglas...)

  22. #22

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Yeah thanks guys I think I'll just play as the teacher requests for a couple if weeks till I get a bit more comfortable and then I'll start putting some fills into it.
    CURRENT SETUP-
    Sonic Drive 7 piece kit.
    2 up 2 down

    - Sabian AA Holy China 17"
    - Meinl classics custom extreme metal crash 18"
    - Sabian AA 16" crash
    - Zildjian Z custom 20" ride
    - Evans G2 heads
    - Pearl Demon Drive Double Pedal
    -Joey Jordison signature snare drum.

    Drummer For: *BAND HAS NO NAME YET*
    Genre:Metal/Screamo

  23. #23

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Put some vids up here. Maybe we can boost your confidence.
    I am currently suffering from gear acquisition syndrome. Will trade soul for drum gear. Donations accepted.

    -Tama Superstar Hyper-Drive 5-piece
    -SP Hardware
    -Gibraltar Avenger DB-Pedal
    -PST5 Cymbals

    "Uncontrollable urticaria drivel spurting" -a sentence spawned from the half a word story.

  24. #24

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    im an intermediate player at best. last winter i went to GC and sat at a kit and started playing. the drum salesman came over and jumped on another kit and we tore the roof off the joint for a half hour. when we stopped there was a crowd of a dozen people who thought it was a recording. i humbly bowed and said thanks and left with the biggest smile on my face. try it.

  25. #25

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    Default Re: Confidence issues

    Quote Originally Posted by Lucius-Borich-JR View Post
    Ok I have a class band lesson in Monday I'll play then. Do you think when I play next week I should play a basic beat then after a couple of weeks I should put some solos into it. Or should I put some fills in straight away?
    First and foremost drummers need to keep time and keep the beat going. Don't overplay. Fills can be important, but unless they are "signature" to the song, many songs can do without a lot of them. Solos, as much as they are impressive in some sense, aren't really necessary in most songs or playing situations.

    Keep it simple and play well and you'll be surprised how well you come off to other people, particularly musicians.
    Jesse

    1986 Tama Crestar - Lacquered Piano White
    2016 Roland TD-25K
    2015 Tama Starclassic B/B - Indigo Blue Sparkle

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