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Thread: Chatting Up!

  1. #1

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    Lightbulb Chatting Up!

    During the last couple of years, I've delved into reading non-fiction books. And eventually got into the whole business/self-improvement/brainstorming reading spree.

    Just to give you an idea of some that I have found quite interesting:
    1.) Malcom Gladwell - Blink
    2.) "The Power of Culture - Driving Today's Organisation"
    3.) How to be a Complete and Utter Failure in Life, Work and Everything: 44 1/2 Steps to Lasting Underachievement - Steve McDermott

    Another one of those books would be 'How to be Brilliant' by Micheal Heppell.

    Yes...yes...I know! the last two titles....err...sound a bit flimsy...and it wouldn't really motivate you to pick it up from the shelf!

    Back to my point.

    Basically...I would like to know of some things you would be interested to hear as a conversation starter. It would be particularly helpful if you have experienced working in a checkout counter (yes...when the payment is being made). It has been said that people always welcome someone who chats them up (I'm not referring to a pick-up!).

    If you have read Micheal Heppell's book, you would be familiar with the connection method (improving youself by exercising your ability to connect with others, no matter what situation). [As for the term itself...it's not really ' the connection method'...but hopefully the term gives you a good idea]

    Here are some that I whip out when the timing suits:
    1.) In a lift -- entering with another person or two: 'off to the next place huh?'
    2.) In the park, train.... --- motioning to the empty seat/spot: "Would you mind?"
    3.) As a customer paying for a purchase in a store --- "So....just starting your day huh?" (just in case this isn't the person who assisted you with your purchase)
    4.) When someone makes a mistake, and apologises for it --- 'Well....these things happen'

    I actually believe that seeing others is also seeing ourselves in a different way. So...it is like pushing for 'wanted connections', not unwanted ones.

    Hey...it's all about making the world a better place to live in...even if it's just giving someone a smile.

    So...I'm leaving it...to you...pretty open ended! Maybe stories how you and your best mate have met? A powerful sentence that you think helps in diffusing a particularly tense situation?

  2. #2

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    Default Re: Chatting Up!

    Wow, that's really interesting! Completely different way of looking at the world than me.
    My self-improvement largely consists of reading fiction that is largely negative and looking for the positivity in it, or just raw narrative technique and being amazed by artists potential; or by learning something new on an instrument, or gleaming something from a film. But how I react to other people is something I've gained from reading philosophy (my favourite philosophers are Nietzche and Aristotle) and my head's buzzing at the moment, so I'll explain it later, when I can comprehend my thoughts more clearly and pensively. But I think this is a fantastic topic! Well done!
    Today, on Ethel The Frog...

  3. #3

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    Lightbulb Lost in....Equation.

    Ethel,

    I'm looking forward to hearing fellow DC formers answers/thoughts. Glad that you like the topic!

    Some Related books on some subjects you touched on:
    1.) Your Brain On Music - Daniel Levitin
    2.) The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything
    - Ken Robinson

    Have you come across any of them?

    And to steer my questions closer to the topic (Before I get scolded by the 'powers that be in DC'). I was just wondering...would you necessary welcome someone who would approach you? Maybe in a DVD store, One of the Large Music stores, Or in a bookstore? And just to make the question more tangible...how would you feel if someone approached you to ask for a piece of paper? (I certainly think that I'd likely be one of those people, since I browse around DVD/Book shops and note down what I like for future reference)

    Why those particular questions? Well I believe that each of us represents a stereotype (or a combination of them), so...it's just like an apple trying to understand oranges. (or maybe it's the other way around...since I'd like to be an orange in the example.)



    - Leigh

    Quote Originally Posted by Ethel_The_Frog View Post
    Wow, that's really interesting! Completely different way of looking at the world than me.
    My self-improvement largely consists of reading fiction that is largely negative and looking for the positivity in it, or just raw narrative technique and being amazed by artists potential; or by learning something new on an instrument, or gleaming something from a film. But how I react to other people is something I've gained from reading philosophy (my favourite philosophers are Nietzche and Aristotle) and my head's buzzing at the moment, so I'll explain it later, when I can comprehend my thoughts more clearly and pensively. But I think this is a fantastic topic! Well done!

  4. #4

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    Default Re: Chatting Up!

    It might just be me but your inital post just seems like common sense. 2 and 4 are just being polite really and are the sort of thing i would do anyways. I find the best way of connecting with people is just asking them how their day went

  5. #5

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    Smile Re: Chatting Up!

    Stan,

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

    Apologies if I came across as claiming I am a pioneer...to any of the conversation starters that I mentioned.

    As you mentioned, asking people about their day is another way of connecting with others. I do agree that it may be the best (if not one of them) method in trying to prod (and hope) for a generous answer by the person answering.

    - Leigh


    Quote Originally Posted by Mysterious Stan View Post
    It might just be me but your inital post just seems like common sense. 2 and 4 are just being polite really and are the sort of thing i would do anyways. I find the best way of connecting with people is just asking them how their day went

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