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Thread: Drummer Jokes

  1. #1

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    Default Drummer Jokes

    I get them all the time, as drummers we are the butt end of some lame jokes and some pretty good ones. Remember, this is all in fun, and I'm a drummer too so don't come after me if you don't like this thread.

    What's the best one you've heard? What's the latest one you've heard? Got one you want to share?

    Question: What did the drummer get on his SAT's?
    Answer: Drool

    Q: What's the difference between a drummer and a savings bond?
    A: One will mature and make money.
    Serve The Song, Not The Ego - NEP

  2. #2

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    LOL there's another thread for this one too already, but I'll go...

    Question:
    What is a drummer's best form of birth control?
    Answer:
    His personality
    MY KIT: 5 Piece Westbury, Remo Ambassador Heads and Remo Muff'l Rings on all drums, Sabian AA 20" Metal-X Ride, Zildjian ZXT 16" Rock Crash, Pearl 14" Hats, Pearl 18" Crash Ride, Wuhan 12" China

    Band Website:

    The Torpedo Identity

    http://www.myspace.com/thetorpedoidentity
    http://www.purevolume.com/blacksunn

  3. #3

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    I didn't realize there was already a thread for this - Ooops. I guess I should have looked first - hwta can I say I'm a drummer.
    Serve The Song, Not The Ego - NEP

  4. #4

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    No worries, people do it all the time. Maybe this will be the resurrection of the last thread, because it died pretty fast
    MY KIT: 5 Piece Westbury, Remo Ambassador Heads and Remo Muff'l Rings on all drums, Sabian AA 20" Metal-X Ride, Zildjian ZXT 16" Rock Crash, Pearl 14" Hats, Pearl 18" Crash Ride, Wuhan 12" China

    Band Website:

    The Torpedo Identity

    http://www.myspace.com/thetorpedoidentity
    http://www.purevolume.com/blacksunn

  5. #5

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    This one is still my favorite:

    What do you do when a drummer is at your door?
    Give him the $20 for the pizza!
    Da' Bum
    Rockin' the beat for fadedblue
    Keepin' time for Andy Harrison & the AOP
    http://www.facebook.com/fadedbluemusic
    DW Performance 5 pc. in White Marine Pearl
    1972 Pearl Deluxe Custom 5 pc. in blue sparkle
    KAT KT-3
    Paiste cymbals
    Gibraltar hardware
    Axis pedals
    Vic Firth sticks
    Evans heads

  6. #6

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    Cool Drummer Jokes

    What did the drummer say to the KEYTAR player?

    "You can't beat a drum for rhythm!"

    keep the beat goin' ... Don't keep it to yourself!

    Charlie

    "If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." --Henry David Thoreau, "Walden," 1854

    "There's a lot to be said for Time Honored tradition and value." --In memory of Frank "fiacovaz" Iacovazzi

    "Maybe your drums can be beat, but you can't."--Jack Keck

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by 1DrumBum
    What do you do when a drummer is at your door?
    Give him the $20 for the pizza!
    Ouch, that hurts. I work as a delivery driver =P

    How can you tell when there's a drummer at your door?
    He knocks and gets faster.

    HB58
    My Kit: Pearl Session Custom 7 Piece w/ Zildjian Cymbals
    My Band: Lead Redemption
    Current Favourite Band: Necrophagist
    Current Favourite Song: To Rid The Disease - Opeth
    Next purchase: Pearl 18"x16" Floor Tom, Zildjian A Custom Crash

    Rudiments?

  8. #8

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    My favorite has always been, "What's the first thing a drummer says when he moves to New York?"

    "Would you like fries with that?"

    More Drummer Jokes

  9. #9

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    How do you tell if the stage is level?

    Drool comes out both corners of the drummers mouth.

    Keith

  10. #10

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    Q: How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: Five, one to change it and four to say Neil Peart could have done it better.
    Serve The Song, Not The Ego - NEP

  11. #11

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    q: how many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
    a: none, there is a machine to do that now

  12. #12

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    Q: What's the worst thing about being a drummer
    A: Telling your parents that you're gay

  13. #13

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    Q: What's the worst thing about being a drummer
    A: Telling your parents that you're gay
    Ouch, harsh
    MY KIT: 5 Piece Westbury, Remo Ambassador Heads and Remo Muff'l Rings on all drums, Sabian AA 20" Metal-X Ride, Zildjian ZXT 16" Rock Crash, Pearl 14" Hats, Pearl 18" Crash Ride, Wuhan 12" China

    Band Website:

    The Torpedo Identity

    http://www.myspace.com/thetorpedoidentity
    http://www.purevolume.com/blacksunn

  14. #14

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    Question: What do they call a drummer with half a brain?

    Answer: GIFTED
    MY KIT: 5 Piece Westbury, Remo Ambassador Heads and Remo Muff'l Rings on all drums, Sabian AA 20" Metal-X Ride, Zildjian ZXT 16" Rock Crash, Pearl 14" Hats, Pearl 18" Crash Ride, Wuhan 12" China

    Band Website:

    The Torpedo Identity

    http://www.myspace.com/thetorpedoidentity
    http://www.purevolume.com/blacksunn

  15. #15

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    my favorite...
    Q: why do guitarists have drumsticks on their dash board?
    A: so they can park handicapped...
    PRACTICE SAFE BANGING!!! play drums! My Pearl Session Kit

  16. #16

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    WHAT DID THE DRUMMER GET ON HIS IQ TEST?


    DROOL!!!


    -PerpetualFrog

  17. #17

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    Cool Drummer Jokes

    Quote Originally Posted by CyberComa
    ...we are the butt end of some lame jokes...
    Ouch! that was a rimshot across the bow!

    I hope you don't stick us with any more one-liners like that!
    keep the beat goin' ... Don't keep it to yourself!

    Charlie

    "If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." --Henry David Thoreau, "Walden," 1854

    "There's a lot to be said for Time Honored tradition and value." --In memory of Frank "fiacovaz" Iacovazzi

    "Maybe your drums can be beat, but you can't."--Jack Keck

  18. #18

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    I don't get alot of crap as far as drum jokes go, but I give my rhythm guitarist hell! Its sometimes funny, sometimes mean.
    Like on time, he tried to say something but it came out wrong, and I said:
    "Give him some time to learn the rhythm part to what he is saying."

    You had to be there to get the full force of the joke...
    But this is drummer jokes....so....yeah....
    "If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer."
    - Henry David Thoreau

    My set: Sonor Force 2003 Fusion Kit. 16" B8 Thin Crash, 20" B8 Ride, 16" Wuhan China, 14" B8 hi-hats, 10" AAX Splash
    PDP Double bass Pedal, PDP throne.

  19. #19

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    What do you call a beautiful woman on a drummer's arm?
    A tattoo

  20. #20

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    my fave:

    A Drummers Audition

    A drummer sits behind the drumset and the band leader says, "Can you play a samba pattern with your bass drum?"

    The drummer obliges with a quick "boom b boom" samba pattern.

    The band leader then asks, "Can you add a Mozambique cowbell pattern along with that with your right hand?"

    The drummer thinks to himself, "I can do that, no problem" and obliges, giving it his
    best Steve Gadd possible. He is then told, "Now add a 2/3 clave with your
    left foot on the hi hat."

    The drummer's struggling a bit with this one but finally works it out and stiffins his back, all proud of himself.

    Next he hears, "Now add a cascara pattern on the snare with your left
    hand." Years of studying Gary Chester books and listening to world music finally
    come to fruition and the relieved drummer finds he can play the whole pattern
    with no problem.

    Pleased with himself, he asks the band leader "So, do I get the job?

    "No " says the bandleader "that's why we fired the last guy!"

    (compliments of DrumJokes.com)

  21. #21

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    Cool Drummer Jokes

    Jackdrums--how'd you know that was my audition?

    keep the beat goin' ... Don't keep it to yourself!

    Charlie

    "If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." --Henry David Thoreau, "Walden," 1854

    "There's a lot to be said for Time Honored tradition and value." --In memory of Frank "fiacovaz" Iacovazzi

    "Maybe your drums can be beat, but you can't."--Jack Keck

  22. #22

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    Hahahaha what a sweet joke
    I really wish that we could actually show the pictures in here...

  23. #23

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    This one's my fave:
    What's the difference between a drummer and a large pizza?
    One can feed a family of four!
    I AM SABIAN MAN!


    Next Drum Purchase: Piccolo Snare
    Next Cymbal purchase: Splash cymbal and splash claw.

  24. #24

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    Quote Originally Posted by CyberComa
    Q: How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: Five, one to change it and four to say Neil Peart could have done it better.
    lmao

    i guess the joke in my info is kinda drum related...
    Band: System of a Down
    Song: Atwa




    Current: four way independence

  25. #25

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    If I may... how do you know there is a drummer at your door? The knocking gets louder and speeds up...

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