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  1. #1

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    Thumbs up Any Clean Good Jokes?

    I was wondering if anyone has any clean good jokes to share with everyone. hope this little example does not offend anyone or religions ec. This is in fun.


    Family Tree of Vincent Van Gogh:

    His dizzy aunt ----------------------------------------------- Verti Gogh

    The brother who ate prunes------------------------------- Gotta Gogh

    The brother who worked at a convenience store ------ Stop N Gogh

    The grandfather from Yugoslavia ----------------------------- U Gogh

    His magician uncle -------------------------------- Where-diddy Gogh

    His Mexican cousin ---------------------------------------- A Mee Gogh

    The Mexican cousin's American half-brother ------------ Gring Gogh

    The nephew who drove a stage coach --------------- Wells-far Gogh

    The constipated uncle ------------------------------------- Can't Gogh

    The ballroom dancing aunt -------------------------------- Tang Gogh

    The bird lover uncle -------------------------------------- Flamin Gogh

    The fruit-loving cousin -------------------------------------- Man Gogh

    An aunt who taught positive thinking ------------------ Way-to-Gogh

    The little bouncy nephew ----------------------------------- Poe Gogh

    A sister who loved disco -------------------------------------- Go Gogh

    And his niece who travels the country in an RV --- Winnie Bay Gogh

    I saw you smiling . . . there ya Gogh!

  2. #2

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    Default Re: any clean good jokes

    Lmao. Well done mcx man, well done.
    ZildjianLeague/LP/Aquarian/Mapex/Pearl
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  3. #3

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    Good Gogh-ing Pearl MCX man!



    .
    Drum DVDs
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    T.C.

  4. #4

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    Thanks Guys I was worried that it may offend but I guess this forum is not that touchy I guess. You guys thought that was funny check out my you might be a drummer if? Gotta Gogh now.
    Last edited by Pearl MCX Man; 05-09-2011 at 02:32 PM.

  5. #5

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    Funny stuff.

    I'll add one. One for gonefishin

    World's Best Salesman

    A young guy from Minnesota moved to Florida and went to a big
    'everything under one roof' department store looking for a job . The
    Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid says, "Yeah.

    I was a salesman back in Minnesota ."

    The boss liked the kid, so he gave him the job. " You start tomorrow, > I'll come after we close and see how you did."

    His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the
    store was locked up, the boss came down. "How many customers bought
    something from you today?" The kid says, "One." The boss says, "Just
    one? Our sales people average 20 to 30 customers a day. How much was
    the sale for?" "The kid says "$101,237.65" The boss says "$101,237.65
    What the heck did you sell?" The kid says, "First, I sold him a small
    fishhook. Then I sold him a medium fishhook. Then I sold him a larger
    fishhook. Then a new fishing rod . Then I asked him where he was going
    fishing and he said down the coast; I told him he was going to need a
    boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a twin
    engine Chris Craft . Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic
    would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and
    sold him that 4x4 Expedition.
    " The boss said, "A guy came in here to
    buy a fishhook, and you sold him a boat AND A TRUCK?" The kid said,
    "No, the guy came in here to buy tampons for his wife; I said, 'Dude,
    your weekend's shot, you should go fishing....."
    “I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.”

  6. #6

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    Very good one PopsOldSkins I'm sure gonefishing was that customer, got to be.
    Last edited by Pearl MCX Man; 05-09-2011 at 03:08 PM.

  7. #7

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    Here's one to add to the Vincent Van Gogh jokes.

    Did you know his sister entertains people?

    Yeah, didnt you know? She's a Gogh-Gogh dancer!

    =========

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    "...it's the Paradigm Of The Cosmos!" Stewart Copeland on Youtube

    668: The Number Of The Guy Next Door To The Beast.

    "A random act of kindness; it keeps my heart in shape!" - Late8

  8. #8

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    Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar, and the bartender says "hey, what's with the long face..........?"
    Tama Rockstar & Paiste User and Abuser......

  9. #9

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    my neighbour banged on my door at 3am this morning; can you believe that???

    Luckily is was still up playing my drums

    neighbours_quotes_04.jpg
    If you are going through hell...keep going!

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by chrisbkk View Post
    my neighbour banged on my door at 3am this morning; can you believe that???

    Luckily is was still up playing my drums
    Good one.

  11. #11

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    Quote Originally Posted by spesman View Post
    Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar, and the bartender says "hey, what's with the long face..........?"
    HA!!

    How many bureaucrats does it take to change a light bulb?

    Two. One to screw it in and one to screw it up.
    "...it's the Paradigm Of The Cosmos!" Stewart Copeland on Youtube

    668: The Number Of The Guy Next Door To The Beast.

    "A random act of kindness; it keeps my heart in shape!" - Late8

  12. #12

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    2 electrons walk out of a bar. One electron says," Wait, I think I forgot something." The second electron asks, "Are you sure?"
    The first electron replies, "I'm positive."
    "The chances of being attacked and killed by a terrorist are less than the chances of being attacked and killed by your own heart"
    Carrying the message to Garcia. Today and everyday.
    Temple Beth Snare Buzz-Head Rabbi

  13. #13

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    Two trees a birch and a beech see a little tree in between them so the birch says is that a son of a birch or a son of a beech. The beech not sure so let'sask the wood pecker who happened to be around. Could you tell us if this little tree is a son of a beech or son of a birch. The woodpecker says ok I'll check it out. No says the woodpecker it is not a son of a beech or a son of a birch but it sure is the best tasting piece of ash I ever put my pecker into.

    I hope this joke is not taken the wrong way cause it is kinda clean..

  14. #14

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    A woman is sitting in a bar, sipping her drink, when she hears a small voice beside her saying "that's a lovely dress".
    She looks around to see nobody there. She shrugs her shoulders and continues with her drink.
    Then she hears it again..."it really matches your shoes".
    Again she looks around and there is no-one to be seen.
    She tells the bartender that she can hear a voice telling her how nice she looks, and the bartender says...."oh, that's just the peanuts - they're complimentary".
    Tama Rockstar & Paiste User and Abuser......

  15. #15

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    How many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb?

    None, the keyboardist does it with his left hand.
    - Zack

  16. #16

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    What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?
    Oh DAM

  17. #17

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    What do you call a deer with no eyes?













    No eye deer.

  18. #18

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    Have you heard about the new drink called "The Bin Laden" ??



    It's two shots - and a splash of water.
    "The problem with information on the Internet is that you can not validate it's authenticity. " -Abraham Lincoln

    SILVERFOX DRUMSTICKS & SOULTONE CYMBALS Endorsing Artist.

  19. #19

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    Quote Originally Posted by EddieV View Post
    Have you heard about the new drink called "The Bin Laden" ??



    It's two shots - and a splash of water.



    Drum Accessories
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    T.C.

  20. #20

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    What did the Zero say to the number Eight?…








    Nice belt.

  21. #21

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    What does a 300 pound canary say?
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
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    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
    ..
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    ..
    TWEET TWEET

  22. #22

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    Quote Originally Posted by areFish View Post
    What did the Zero say to the number Eight?…








    Nice belt.
    For days I was trying to figure out what this had to do with the belt then all of a sudden it hit me OK I get it.

  23. #23

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pearl MCX Man View Post
    For days I was trying to figure out what this had to do with the belt then all of a sudden it hit me OK I get it.
    Tap tap tap, is this thing on? Thank you folks! I'll be in the Cabana Room all week.

  24. #24

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    Exclamation Re: any clean good jokes

    [B]THE TINY CABIN[B]

    A social worker from a big city in Massachusetts recently transferred to the mountains of West Virginia and was on the first tour of her new territory when she came upon the tiniest cabin she had seen in all of her life.Intrigued,she walked up and knocked on the door.

    "Anybody home?",she asked.

    "Yep",came a kids voice through the door.

    "Is your father there?",asked the social worker.

    "Pa? Nope he left before Ma came in",said the kid.

    "Well,is your mother there?",persisted the social worker.

    "Ma? Nope,she left afore I got here",said the kid.

    "But",protested the social worker,"are you never together as a family?"

    "Sure,but not here",said the kid through the door.

    "This is the outhouse!"
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    T.C.

  25. #25

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    How can you tell that there is a singer at your door?

    They don't have the key and they can't come in on their own.

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