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Thread: my band is killing my desire to play drums.

  1. #1

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    Default my band is killing my desire to play drums.

    I think it's really time for a change. The guitar player doesn't understand bpms. He keeps thinking I'm speeding up just because the kick drum goes to 16ths. Then they want me to play the easiest drum beat know to man, followed by a riff that ends on the 3. And then the guitar player speeds up on the chorus. Suddenly it's my fault. Then the guitar player won't even communicate. He just stops talking when I bring it up.
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  2. #2

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    Time to play with a click and prove them wrong and then when they apologize let them know you're done.... Peace out
    14pc Yamaha Maple Custom Vintage (24pc in total) | 12pc PDP X7 | 9pc Ludwig Jr. | 9pc Pork Pie ZebraWood | 7pc PDP Concept Maple Classic | 5pc Sonor International | 5pc Ddrum Dominion | 5pc Orbitone | 4pc Sonor Martini | 65 Snare drums and growing!

  3. #3

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    Yeah, kinda where I'm at with it. There are other bands that need drummers around.
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  4. #4

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    Default Re: my band is killing my desire to play drums.

    Time to move on.

  5. #5

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    Time to leave.

  6. #6

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    Yep go.

  7. #7

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    just went through something similar, did a short fill starting on 2 ending on the and of 4 and the bass player almost had an embolism. I told him what I was doing and he said he cannot count like that? I still don't know what that means. I have moved on and decided to learn the Bass, maybe there is something I am missing : )
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    Decide whether this is love for the craft or simply an ego thing

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  8. #8

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    Default Re: my band is killing my desire to play drums.

    Quote Originally Posted by MDK View Post
    just went through something similar, did a short fill starting on 2 ending on the and of 4 and the bass player almost had an embolism. I told him what I was doing and he said he cannot count like that? I still don't know what that means. I have moved on and decided to learn the Bass, maybe there is something I am missing : )

    omg my singer said the same thing to me all the time... he couldn't count with my fills lol I would just laugh at him and say it's ok you can't remember your words either
    14pc Yamaha Maple Custom Vintage (24pc in total) | 12pc PDP X7 | 9pc Ludwig Jr. | 9pc Pork Pie ZebraWood | 7pc PDP Concept Maple Classic | 5pc Sonor International | 5pc Ddrum Dominion | 5pc Orbitone | 4pc Sonor Martini | 65 Snare drums and growing!

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by piratemonkey124 View Post
    I think it's really time for a change. The guitar player doesn't understand bpms. He keeps thinking I'm speeding up just because the kick drum goes to 16ths. Then they want me to play the easiest drum beat know to man, followed by a riff that ends on the 3. And then the guitar player speeds up on the chorus. Suddenly it's my fault. Then the guitar player won't even communicate. He just stops talking when I bring it up.
    Introduce them to Mr Metronome - throw it at the guitar player.

  10. #10

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    Doesn't matter. He changes bpm mid song.
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  11. #11

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    Default Re: my band is killing my desire to play drums.

    We battle this to some degree but never to the childish level your guitar player is taking it. What guitarists and vocalists don't get is that if a tempo speeds up in the middle of a song it isn't ALWAYS the drummers fault. Sometimes I find myself chasing them and since we don't play to a metronome, tempos will fluctuate through-out a song. Yes I'm sure it's sometimes my fault, but not always and probably not most of the time.

    Fills. OMG fills. I've had to shorten/simplify basic fills because for the the most part they can't play through them. Which leads me back to point one...if you don't have a sense of timing, how can you blame any one person for tempo changes.

    Thankfully, there are no egos in my situation and we always work through them.

    I don't see your problem as much about timing as I do the guitarist ego. If it were me and this situation isn't how you make your living, I'd tell them to stick it and leave. I don't put up with egomaniacs and remedial BS.

    Tex

  12. #12

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    I should also state that the music we play is simple and straight forward most of the time. And I think that helps too. If you are in a progressive rock band I think these issues are amplified, in my opinion.

  13. #13

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    Well I got home and played the beats the way they are supposed to at 92 bpm where he said the song was played it. Shifted back and forth through it a few times with zero problems. Then last night he sent a video with some changes "to help me with the transition". Well now it's completely out of time.
    I really won't quit drumming, probably just this project. Too much time and money invested. And besides there's other bands that want me to come jam with them.
    Last edited by piratemonkey124; 06-02-2016 at 12:14 PM. Reason: adding to my comment.
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  14. #14

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    Quote Originally Posted by piratemonkey124 View Post
    ...And besides there's other bands that want me to come jam with them.
    There you go! Time to say "see ya"!

  15. #15

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    As a drummer, I view my "job" as making the song/band flow smooth and steady and keeping everyone together and tight. If I need to alter my beats, fills, etc., in order to form the overall finished product, I do it. Many times I add "ques" to help keep the guitar solo or vocalist on track and signal chord changes, breaks, endings or when to come back in. That said, I agree with Tex. I've found that 10% of our tempo and virtually 0% of our timing issues are actually me. 90-100% of the time it's vocals or guitars rushing. Sometimes I feel like I'm the brakeman on a runaway train...but if they don't listen to me, I got very few options. I usually start pounding the back-beat and hope to get their attention, LOL.

    I watched a video of a local 3pc band; drums, bass, guitar. The guitar player went into a solo and the drummer decided to get "frisky" on the drums. After several measures, the drummer lost "1" and the groove and the guitar player had no idea where they were. He couldn't time his solo phrasing and had to abandon ship.
    -Brian

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    Play the SONG......not the DRUMS!!!

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  16. #16

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    Give those guys the axe and kick rocks! To many bands out there that need drummers. Part of a band is listening to the other musicians and making needed corrections.

  17. #17

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    Pirate.......................

    I have a guitar player in my band that is very talented...............he can play with touch and beauty...............and when desired, he can shred it too.

    BUT..................he is definitely "tempo-challenged".

    We have songs that begin with his guitar part. If I don't give him a tempo, he will start the song too slow............every time.

    The difference with our situation and yours:
    My guitar player knows he has a tempo problem and asks for my assistance.......which he trusts.
    So it is really not a problem in my band because we communicate honestly.

    In your band, the problem is the guitarist can't see that he has a challenge...............or...............just won't admit it.
    Gretsch USA & Zildjian
    (What Else Would I Ever Need ?)


  18. #18

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    Quote Originally Posted by N2Bluz View Post
    As a drummer, I view my "job" as making the song/band flow smooth and steady and keeping everyone together and tight. If I need to alter my beats, fills, etc., in order to form the overall finished product, I do it. Many times I add "ques" to help keep the guitar solo or vocalist on track and signal chord changes, breaks, endings or when to come back in.
    YES !

    N2................

    I had a jazz combo instructor in college (he was also a drummer) that told this to me on the first day in front of the entire ensemble..............

    "This semester, you are the drummer for the jazz ensemble and it is your job to provide the three following components in this order of importance:

    First is 'tempo'..............this is the most important and it must be consistent;
    Second is the 'cue'..............there are times during a song wherein you must cue the horn section or some other part of the band;
    Third is 'fills'.............fills are not completely necessary but are allowed and appreciated only when the tempo and the cue have been taken care of.............a fill can be a cue............but it must be proper and it must be in tempo."

    I have utilized this simple instruction in all of the pop & rock bands I have been a part of and it always fits well.
    Gretsch USA & Zildjian
    (What Else Would I Ever Need ?)


  19. #19

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    Just this past week I explained to the bass that, if he has trouble with keeping/ finding the beat, my fills are usually short melodies ending on the FT. Most of the time I try keeping things simple just for him. Luckily, the lead guitar player has no such problem. FYI the music is usually classic Hendrix(sounds dumb with simple fills) or Petty(more up-tempo grooves than fills.)
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  20. #20

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    My first band, years ago, had a guitarist who played really well but had no internal sense of rhythm, especially when he went into a solo section. Many songs I would add a cue for him to find where he was.

    Flash forward 20+ years, I resume playing again, and this time I occasionally have to have a cue for the bass player. Not nearly as challenged as my guy in the old band, but on certain songs, he just doesn't "feel" it.

    I'm far from perfect, tempo-wise. I catch myself speeding up occasionally. Aggravates me, and I work at it. We tend to play everything too fast as it is, I'm trying to reign it in. (Guitar players fault more than mine in this band, heh heh.) And the irony in that is strong, given how I was when I started, back in the day....

    I'm envious of you folks that can play to a click. We messed around with one while recording a particular piece, and it was definitely a challenge for me. I was thinking about the click more than what I was doing. Perhaps it would come easier with more practice, I'm just glad we aren't trying to do that stuff very often.

  21. #21

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    Get into another band!!!

  22. #22

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    I got another message changing his perceived bpm he won't follow anyway. Along with wanting to have a practice that's going to end in another argument.
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  23. #23

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    There are certain things in life that are inevitable:

    Taxes

    Divorce (for me anyway)

    Becoming a musician and then having to deal with them

    This overwhelming urge to relocate drumsticks into places in other musicians where they were never designed to go and definitely not designed to fit with anything approaching comfort

    Trying to overcome the language barrier that seems to exist between guitar players and society as a whole and drummers in particular.

    Trying to learn said language when Swahili and Russian would be easier

    Attempting to keep oneself out of jail when dealing with guitar players/singers when a Federal Maximum Security prison seems like a viable alternative

    Finally, the peace of death where, if Rick has not been good in life, he gets both his ex-wives for eternity, OR, if he has been considered good, he gets 72 ladies of his own choosing and a case on Johnny Walker Blue delivered every month, and stamina, must have stamina, lots of stamina.

  24. #24

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    Quote Originally Posted by piratemonkey124 View Post
    I got another message changing his perceived bpm he won't follow anyway. Along with wanting to have a practice that's going to end in another argument.
    Maybe it's just time to call it. If they can't handle two-way communication and be constructive, the band won't go anywhere anyway. If you can find a group with positive attitudes, knows how to work together and have fun doing it, the potential is unlimited.
    -Brian

    "Too many crappy used drum stuff to list"

    Play the SONG......not the DRUMS!!!

    "I think that feeling is a lot more important than technique. It's all very well doing a triple paradiddle - but who's going to know you've done it? If you play technically you sound like everybody else. It's being original that counts." ~ John Bonham

  25. #25

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    Quote Originally Posted by piratemonkey124 View Post
    I think it's really time for a change. The guitar player doesn't understand bpms. He keeps thinking I'm speeding up just because the kick drum goes to 16ths. Then they want me to play the easiest drum beat know to man, followed by a riff that ends on the 3. And then the guitar player speeds up on the chorus. Suddenly it's my fault. Then the guitar player won't even communicate. He just stops talking when I bring it up.
    This may seem a but dumb - does he want you to play a single bar in 5/8 time to make his guitar solo work, but can't express it?

    As far as his suggestion that you are speeding up when you play 16th notes, well that is kind of funny but you can't fix stupid.

    It sounds like they want you as their very own Meg White, but Meg can keep time so it sounds your guitar player would still have problems.
    Last edited by crispycritters; 06-03-2016 at 02:19 PM. Reason: I can't count

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