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Thread: Really cool moment with my son

  1. #1

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    Default Really cool moment with my son

    So I had one of those moments that makes everything worth it yesterday. My oldest son who also drums has battled some issues in his life. He had social anxiety disorder from a young age, which he got through with the help of years of therapy. This past school year everything was fine, but towards the end of the year he let too much stuff build up and ended up back in therapy with moderate to severe depression. Luckily he is doing much better now, almost back to his old cheerful self. One of the results of his depression was he stopped playing drums. He said where they used to bring him joy, now they were just one more thing that he felt he was failing at. His mom and I put no pressure on him, told him his kit was there when he wanted to get back on whether that was a week, a year, or a decade. We just wanted him to get back on if he could find joy in it again. So this summer he has gone down a few times and just jammed, but still has not started back up at lessons. Yesterday as I was down on my kit, he come bounding down and sits at his kit with a big smile on his face and asks if I want to trade fours with him (3 measures of grove, 1 measure of fill). We played back and forth for a good 20-30 minutes and had a blast. He says he wants to get back to lessons after school starts back up and he is sure what his workload is going to be. He sounded really good on the kit, like he hadn't missed a beat. The main thing is I saw the joy on his face when he was on his kit and it brought a huge smile to my face.
    Yamaha Stage Custom 22x16, 12x10, 13x11, 16x16 Cranberry Red 14x5 Ludwig Acrolite (1976)
    Zildjian A Custom Hats, Zildjian 20" A Medium Ride, Dream Contact Crashes 16" & 17"
    Pearl P2002B Double Bass Pedal

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  2. #2

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    Default Re: Really cool moment with my son

    That's awesome bud, we always think kids nowadays have it so much easier than we did but I can't imagine growing up in the social media nightmare of today. That's great that your there for him and not pushing him, just being there is the best thing you can do.
    Crush Sublime Birch

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    Decide whether this is love for the craft or simply an ego thing

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  3. #3

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    That’s great news!
    My youngest son has social anxiety issues as well. He can’t stand to be around a large group of people (like at a restaurant) and has had issues holding downs job. He’s 20yrs old and still doesn’t drive. It’s hard for me (Mr outgoing personality) to understand and deal with, but I do the best I can.
    -Brian

    "Too many crappy used drum stuff to list"

    Play the SONG......not the DRUMS!!!

    "I think that feeling is a lot more important than technique. It's all very well doing a triple paradiddle - but who's going to know you've done it? If you play technically you sound like everybody else. It's being original that counts." ~ John Bonham

  4. #4

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    That’s so cool that he’s back playing the drums again.

    I too suffer from social anxiety and depression and I’m back in therapy but what has helped me the most is playing my drums and getting positive feedback from playing them in front of a small group of people like jam sessions or at church when I sub for the regular drummer.

    Since my divorce, I live alone in a one bedroom apartment. I don’t have many friends but having my kit set up as though I’m going to play them really helps me get through the day.

    I still look back over 40 years ago when my dad (RIP) helped pay for 1/2 of a used 3pc Ludwig Super Classic I still own.

    Your dedication to your son and the support you offer through drumming reminds me of what dad did for me when I needed it the most at age 19.

    I gave my now 15 year old son his first guitar, at 11; a brand new USA made Strat. hoping it will someday make a difference like you and my dad did for us sons.

    Thanks for sharing such a great moment. It made my day!!
    Last edited by late8; 08-05-2019 at 09:24 AM.

  5. #5

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    Awesome!!

  6. #6

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    Default Re: Really cool moment with my son

    Thanks guys, this is why I love this place. Not many places left on the internet where you can go and get the kind of support/understanding that this group of drummers gives. Have a great week.
    Yamaha Stage Custom 22x16, 12x10, 13x11, 16x16 Cranberry Red 14x5 Ludwig Acrolite (1976)
    Zildjian A Custom Hats, Zildjian 20" A Medium Ride, Dream Contact Crashes 16" & 17"
    Pearl P2002B Double Bass Pedal

    Pearl Masters Studio Birch MBX 22x16, 10x10, 12x10, 13x11, 16x16 White Mist 14x6.5 Masters Studio Birch Snare
    Zildjian 14" New Beats, Sabian 22" AA Ride, Sabian 18" Paragon Crash, Zildjian 16" Medium Thin Crash
    Tama Iron Cobra Single Pedal

  7. #7

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    that would be so incredible... I only hope I can share music with my daughters some day!
    14pc Yamaha Maple Custom Vintage (24pc in total) | 12pc PDP X7 | 9pc Ludwig Jr. | 8pc Pork Pie ZebraWood | 6pc Sonor | 5pc Ddrum Dominion | 5pc Orbitone |4pc Sonor Martini | 55 Snare drums and growing!

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by SpazApproved View Post
    that would be so incredible... I only hope I can share music with my daughters some day!
    It all goes away once they discover the evils of the Cell Phone.


    Good for you and your son, OE!
    Signature here

  9. #9

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    My Mother played piano, as did my dad and sister. I played cornet and drums and my brother plays guitar.
    I have two sons in their twenties who like music, but have no apparent desire to play any instruments.
    Now if you could get a piano to play video games....

  10. #10

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    Love this! The bond with your children during formative years is priceless. Thanks for being a great father!
    - Tom

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  11. #11

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    Default Re: Really cool moment with my son

    Trading fours is fun. Trading fours with your son is priceless.
    "The chances of being attacked and killed by a terrorist are less than the chances of being attacked and killed by your own heart"
    Carrying the message to Garcia. Today and everyday.
    Temple Beth Snare Buzz-Head Rabbi

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