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Thread: Band Drama

  1. #1

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    Friday our Rhythm Guitar player sends a message to the bass player saying he just left the dr's office and is on steroids for a real painful shoulder and may not be able to make our gig on sat. night

    Bass player tells me only on sat. and of course I say, "well why did he not message everyone in the band" the lead player especially needs to know that.

    well he finally sends text to everyone stating his shoulder issues and going to try to make it but no promises. O I am like OK well as long as the lead can do it we should be good. Lead says yes he can cover it so no problem.

    Sat. night the rhythm player shows up 20 minutes before the gig luggin in all his stuff and we are like take it easy bud how is your shoulder and he is like thanks it feels much better but then went on about how the dr. mentioned he should be in more pain blah blah blah, he went on and on.

    well we play the gig and it was really good one, I get up this am and see his picture in the local online paper where he played hockey with the Bruins alumni all day sat. arrggghhhh why do people have to be ****?

    Ya know be honest with it, I know when I mention it this week he is just going to say how I would have been upset had he told us he would rather play hockey than make a gig he committed to, and ya damn right I would have been but at least I would not be able to call you a friggin liar.

    I sent the pics to rest of the guys but as usual I dont think anyone cares but me.. I don't know maybe it's time for me to just be done with this band crap or drop my level of commitment which I dont believe I can do.

    what do you guys think am I just being a hard *** and should just roll with it? This is not the 1st issue with this guy but I don't want to bore ya with all that.
    Last edited by MDK; 11-24-2019 at 07:57 PM.
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  2. #2

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    I'm with you. I impose a high level of commitment on myself to band related activites and, consequently, impose that same level on to others. These expectation are made clear from the outset so everyone knows what they are getting in to. As a result, if a member of the band I was in had committed to a gig then put that gig into jeapody through taking on a later commitment, that'd be a problem. Add in the lying then it take that problem to a whole new level.
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  3. #3

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    Yeah we are also having troubles with our bass player. He knows when practice is and keeps scheduling himself to work on those days and it's pissing everyone off pretty hard.

  4. #4

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    You're not wrong

  5. #5

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    As usual, the hardest part about being in a band is not the music, it's the relationships among the members. It's often been said being in a band is like being married to 4(or more) people. If the band members are not contributing an equal effort, or there's a lack of trust or honesty, it's not likely to work out in the long run. We have let several members of one of my current bands go over the last few years, and it was never about talent or ability.

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  6. #6

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    Funny, the most recent bass player in my band was the reason I bailed. What's with these guys?
    Signature here

  7. #7

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    The thing is, just about every single band I've ever played in has some version of this. Someone that slacks or doesn't tell the truth or is always late, or...

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by SpazApproved View Post
    Yeah we are also having troubles with our bass player. He knows when practice is and keeps scheduling himself to work on those days and it's pissing everyone off pretty hard.
    As musicians, we fall into 3 categories:

    1) Dumb

    2) Dumber

    3) Moronic

    We qualify as dumb if "we put up with it",

    We qualify as dumber if we don't confront him/her about it.

    We qualify as moronic if we confront him/her and they don't change and we stay anyway.

    Nubdrummer is right in saying that the relationship with band members is as important as the music itself.



    Quote Originally Posted by nubdrummer View Post
    As usual, the hardest part about being in a band is not the music, it's the relationships among the members. It's often been said being in a band is like being married to 4(or more) people. If the band members are not contributing an equal effort, or there's a lack of trust or honesty, it's not likely to work out in the long run. We have let several members of one of my current bands go over the last few years, and it was never about talent or ability.
    See above

    Quote Originally Posted by Bish View Post
    Funny, the most recent bass player in my band was the reason I bailed. What's with these guys?
    They are musicians, what else would you expect?
    YOU MESS WITH THE DEVIL YOU KNOW.

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  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by rickthedrummer View Post
    they are wanna be musicians, what else would you expect?
    fify
    Signature here

  10. #10

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    It always seems to be something. You'd think as we mature that it would get better. Guess some people are just terminal a**holes.

  11. #11

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    Bish, U gotta 'splain to moi wha "FIFY" means.

    "Guess some people are just terminal a**holes"

    At last count, there are 4.68 million of them. I have dealt with (in 1 way or another) 4.53 million of them.

    I always tried to avoid them, but every place I have ever been, there they were. Sometimes with their entire family.
    YOU MESS WITH THE DEVIL YOU KNOW.

    YOU DON'T MESS WITH THE DEVIL YOU DON'T KNOW.

    VAE VICTIS

    ONCE YOU HIT A CERTAIN AGE, YOU BECOME PERMANENTLY UNIMPRESSED BY A LOT OF CRAP.

    I HIT THAT AGE 20 YEARS AGO.

    IF DOGS CAN'T GO TO HEAVEN, I WANT TO GO WHERE THEY GO

    WILL ROGERS

  12. #12

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    Quote Originally Posted by rickthedrummer View Post
    Bish, U gotta 'splain to moi wha "FIFY" means.
    I modified your statement in my quote.

    FIFY means Fixed it for you.

    Here's another that took a while to figure out.....


    YMMV.

    Let me know when you get that one. lol
    Signature here

  13. #13

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bish View Post
    I modified your statement in my quote.

    FIFY means Fixed it for you.

    Here's another that took a while to figure out.....


    YMMV.

    Let me know when you get that one. lol
    In the mid 1970s (1975 or 1976?) the government passed the "Energy Policy and Conservation Act". One of the provisions of this act was that auto manufacturers needed to post estimated fuel mileage.

    The fine print would state, "Your Mileage May Vary".

    Since then, the phrase, "your mileage may vary" has been repurposed to also mean that the results of your experiences may vary from that of my own. Text speak has shortened this phrase to... YMMV.

    I think that this is a decent explanation, but of course... YMMV.

    Last edited by drummer5359; 12-01-2019 at 09:56 AM.
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  14. #14

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bish View Post
    I modified your statement in my quote.

    FIFY means Fixed it for you.

    Here's another that took a while to figure out.....


    YMMV.

    Let me know when you get that one. lol
    Quote Originally Posted by drummer5359 View Post
    In the mid 1970s (1975 or 1976?) the government passed the "Energy Policy and Conservation Act". One of the provisions of this act was that auto manufacturers needed to post estimated fuel mileage.

    The fine print would state, "Your Mileage May Vary".

    Since then, the phrase, "your mileage may vary" has been repurposed to also mean that the results of your experiences may vary from that of my own. Text speak has shortened this phrase to... YMMV.

    I think that this is a decent explanation, but of course... YMMV.


    All the while I was thinking it had something to do with marriage vows.

    "Till death do us part", with the caveat of "Your marriage may vary", which lead to that old song "You Made Me Vomit" I didn't want to do it, I didn't want to do it, YMMV and all the yada yada yada.
    YOU MESS WITH THE DEVIL YOU KNOW.

    YOU DON'T MESS WITH THE DEVIL YOU DON'T KNOW.

    VAE VICTIS

    ONCE YOU HIT A CERTAIN AGE, YOU BECOME PERMANENTLY UNIMPRESSED BY A LOT OF CRAP.

    I HIT THAT AGE 20 YEARS AGO.

    IF DOGS CAN'T GO TO HEAVEN, I WANT TO GO WHERE THEY GO

    WILL ROGERS

  15. #15

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    It could be worse... he could've played with the Flyers.
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