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Thread: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

  1. #1

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    Default Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    Good evening you all, I never was someone who was fortunate enough to have many drum lessons and I wasn’t even fortunate enough to have good teachers. To be honest, my previous drum lessons were horrible experiences.

    Just an important background view:

    when I had my very first, first lesson it was with the leader of the schools band, he was a self taught drummer who played for 45 years, when he taught his usual subjects he was a very popular teacher, friendly, funny. However when he taught drum lessons to me there was an entire different person standing in front of me, wanting me to play fast and hard 8th notes on the Hihat and yelling at me for not being fast enough and not playing hard enough.

    But the most worse experience was, that he accidentally hit me when playing and showing me the beat again, it was the first time a stick hitting on my skin accidentally ever and because the hit was in a rimshot way I immediately got a blackout inside of my head, fighting against the pain while acting like I wasn’t hit. After this, I swore I’d never take drum lessons again.

    But the time being self taught I got such a difficult tendinitis that I decided once it was healed that I’d try it again.
    My second teacher was a show-off he played each beat with 150 bpm and closed eyes, wanted me to look at the Tips how they behave during performance which I of course avoided as there was just one kit which I sat behind and he stood and I was pretty sure he’d hit me in the face accidentally when I’d do so which resulted in being yelled at.

    I also got yelled at when I asked him how many years he’s already playing with the secret intend to find out why he couldn’t solve the problems I came into the lesson with.
    This was, when I finally quit.

    After that I was looking for my third teacher and applied for a public music school and had to wait six months to even get a first lesson. While waiting on the big day I’ve heard how the teacher yelled at a previous student for playing bad 16th notes. I entered and played and for me it was a normal first lesson with him except for a comment about the way I walk, that wasn’t appropriate and then I got told that the waiting list was full.

    After that I again was self taught again with not progressing, having injuries due to wrong technique and so on.

    Now after a longer time I can start to play again (at least on my Practice Pad) and tomorrow I have my fourth first lesson with a teacher and despite being all online due to local music schools being occupied by too many students, I feel so nervous, I can’t enjoy anything I do, as all I can do is to think about the lesson and how my new teacher will be like, the worry to drop a stick during the lesson or even worse to have him see how I kind of hit myself somewhere accidentally and I can’t even say one thing making sense in conversations already.

    On the other hand of course there’s a positive excitement but the nervousness is strongest.

    What can I do to be less nervous? Please help me!

  2. #2

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    Come out to WI and you can do lessons with me lol


    It is very tough. I can relate to your stories but not in Drum teachers. I struggled with a couple of piano teachers. I had one for many many years and we were very close. She then moved and I had to find a new teacher. Signed up with a guy and I cried for the first 3 lessons after leaving and my mom said nope this guy isn't right. Then the next teacher was what I felt expecting to much. Finally I found another teacher who was a smelly old creepy man but let me tell you, once I got past that he was one of the greatest teachers I had until I got into college.

    I myself have taught for 20 years now and from all of the teachers I've ever had I promised myself never to be like any of the ones that discouraged me. I try my best to adapt to all of my students and not to make them adapt to me.

    All the best and hopefully it works out for you. Just go in and help explain and set your expectations and goals and see what happens!

  3. #3

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    Quote Originally Posted by SpazApproved View Post
    Come out to WI and you can do lessons with me lol


    It is very tough. I can relate to your stories but not in Drum teachers. I struggled with a couple of piano teachers. I had one for many many years and we were very close. She then moved and I had to find a new teacher. Signed up with a guy and I cried for the first 3 lessons after leaving and my mom said nope this guy isn't right. Then the next teacher was what I felt expecting to much. Finally I found another teacher who was a smelly old creepy man but let me tell you, once I got past that he was one of the greatest teachers I had until I got into college.

    I myself have taught for 20 years now and from all of the teachers I've ever had I promised myself never to be like any of the ones that discouraged me. I try my best to adapt to all of my students and not to make them adapt to me.

    All the best and hopefully it works out for you. Just go in and help explain and set your expectations and goals and see what happens!
    I wish I could, but unfortunately I live in Germany. What do you mean by „help explain“?

    Well, it’s easier than it sounds. I’m afraid what he might think when I’m dropping sticks, accidentally hit myself due to overplaying out of anxiety and talk nonsense because my brain is blocked. I’m also afraid that he says that there’s no spot and I have to go through that situation a lot of more times.

  4. #4

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    You are letting this get to you wwwwwaaaayyyyy too much. You are learning to play drums not to do brain surgery.

    If the teacher gives the impression that he (she) will yell at every single mistake then it's time for a new teacher. I've never had a lesson in my life (there were no drum teachers in my hometown) and I did OK.

    I would at least try to get in touch with Emmanuelle Caplette. She is a very good drummer and she might be able to point you in the right direction as far as teachers go. She must have a website on the net. Don't let the frustration of bad teachers cause you to quit.
    YOU MESS WITH THE DEVIL YOU KNOW.

    YOU DON'T MESS WITH THE DEVIL YOU DON'T KNOW.

    VAE VICTIS

    ONCE YOU HIT A CERTAIN AGE, YOU BECOME PERMANENTLY UNIMPRESSED BY A LOT OF CRAP.

    I HIT THAT AGE 20 YEARS AGO.

    IF DOGS CAN'T GO TO HEAVEN, I WANT TO GO WHERE THEY GO

    WILL ROGERS

  5. #5

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    Quote Originally Posted by Chlistadthipster View Post
    I wish I could, but unfortunately I live in Germany. What do you mean by „help explain“?

    Well, it’s easier than it sounds. I’m afraid what he might think when I’m dropping sticks, accidentally hit myself due to overplaying out of anxiety and talk nonsense because my brain is blocked. I’m also afraid that he says that there’s no spot and I have to go through that situation a lot of more times.
    Well since I'm a huge fan of Germany and it's on the top of my bucket list I'll make the trip to you then!

  6. #6

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    Quote Originally Posted by rickthedrummer View Post
    You are letting this get to you wwwwwaaaayyyyy too much. You are learning to play drums not to do brain surgery.

    If the teacher gives the impression that he (she) will yell at every single mistake then it's time for a new teacher. I've never had a lesson in my life (there were no drum teachers in my hometown) and I did OK.

    I would at least try to get in touch with Emmanuelle Caplette. She is a very good drummer and she might be able to point you in the right direction as far as teachers go. She must have a website on the net. Don't let the frustration of bad teachers cause you to quit.
    Thank you for your reply.
    Have heard of her, but don’t see why someone famous as she is should bother with a unknown random like me.

  7. #7

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    I obviously don't know her but having seen her numerous times on the net, the impression I get is that she (being from France and probably has been in Germany many times) would maybe be able to steer you to a good teacher. Worth a try.
    YOU MESS WITH THE DEVIL YOU KNOW.

    YOU DON'T MESS WITH THE DEVIL YOU DON'T KNOW.

    VAE VICTIS

    ONCE YOU HIT A CERTAIN AGE, YOU BECOME PERMANENTLY UNIMPRESSED BY A LOT OF CRAP.

    I HIT THAT AGE 20 YEARS AGO.

    IF DOGS CAN'T GO TO HEAVEN, I WANT TO GO WHERE THEY GO

    WILL ROGERS

  8. #8

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    Quote Originally Posted by SpazApproved View Post
    Come out to WI and you can do lessons with me lol

    Do you do Zoom lessons?

    Acoustic Kits:
    Ludwig Maple 3ply White Cortex 4 pc
    Rukus Mod Orange Club 4 pc
    DW Design 6 pc
    Tama Silverstar Limited Edition Mirage 5 pc
    Tama Superstar 5 pc
    Tama Rockstar 4 pc
    Gretsch Catalina Ash 4 pc

    Slingerland 7 pc

    Electronic Kits:
    Yamaha DTX532k
    Roland TD-27, Roland PD-85 (x4), PD-125, KD9, CY-8 (x2) VH-10, Lemon 15 and 18 cymbals
    Roland SPD-SX Sample Pad

    Snares:
    Tama SLP Black Brass
    Tama SLP G Maple
    Rukus Santos/Bubinga/Poplar/Wenge
    Rukus Avodire/Maple/Mahogany
    1972 Ludwig Supraphonic


    Hardware:
    Tama, DW, Yamaha and Sonor

    Cymbals:
    Zildjian A Series, A Custom and K Custom

    Microphones:
    Miktek, Audix and Shure

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by nubdrummer View Post
    Do you do Zoom lessons?
    I’m wondering as well.


    _
    My emotions were a true rollercoaster, I was that nervous that I literally was about to run up my walls and found dozens of things in my apartment that needed to be cleaned, sorted and… How are my hairs today?

    My lesson was scheduled for 3:00 pm local time and 15 minutes before my potential new teacher wrote me that he’d Skype call me then. Oh no! What’s that? I installed Skype the Day before and had to do a firmware update on my MacBook and now the App was gone. What if I’d have to reinstall everything with a lesson being only 15 Minutes away?
    Luckily I just needed to reinstall the App and all Settings remained.

    I plugged in my Headset but weirdly enough it always slipped my head and I decided to go on without it. When I waited the last few minutes something strange happened. All my anxiety and nervousness disappeared and was replaced by excitement.

    3:00 pm. Man, that guy was as precise as a Swiss clock!
    He called me and waved into the camera I waved back but he couldn’t see me first so I had to search the Camera icon.

    „How are you?“
    „Good.“

    „Where are you getting called from?“ he asked.

    „XY.“ I said.

    „Where’s that?“ he asked.

    Then I explained where my village lays.
    „Maybe you know that I’m calling from Berlin.“

    „yes, I do.“
    „Your name is XY, right?“
    „Yes.“
    „Beautiful name.“
    „Thank you.“
    „Have you played before?“

    While having this smalltalk I felt some ice breaking and so I told him about my bad experiences with drum lessons before.

    „I can’t express how sorry I am for you. Really, that hurts my soul as a teacher! How can someone yell at a student for not putting in enough for his/her hobby? Hearing this really makes me sorry for you and I can also imagine that playing the drums now has to do with something worse. I never put myself upon my students. If they want to get great on the Practice Pad. Cool. If they want to just play one Song for a Year. Cool. I don’t have a set curriculum I need to finish, I can adjust to what the Student needs and they should have fun. I’m sorry what happened to you, but I think your journey could over if you decide to learn from me.“

    More ice broke.
    He then told me about the downsides of Skype Lessons and how to adjust it, the Fees, still seemed to be very shocked about my experiences and we continued talking about it.

    „How old were your teachers?“
    „Uhm, I think 60, 40-45 and 50 years old.“
    „I can imagine what kind of people they were. These id***, sorry that I have to say so, are failed and frustrated careers of musicians which became teachers. Don’t get me wrong, it’s fine if someone just decides to teach and their lessons can be absolutely fine but what you went through… they were just frustrated old men who spit their frustrations on their students. To hear that makes me really upset.“
    We then talked about Game of Thrones and Gaming and then he wanted to know if I’d have questions. Well, maybe my Head was in Recovery Mode as I couldn’t find any question I had to ask.

    „Alright. Then we can end for today. Next week there’s no Online lessons as I have to take a fellow teachers local students next Thursday. We then meet again at 12th of August.“

    This lesson was so different from all others I had although I wasn’t told to play anything and we just talked. I just wished my head wouldn’t have been in recovery mode, because then I’d have asked for something to practice during the break. But what I can say is, that my new teacher seemed to be exactly what I need. I never felt ice breaking during a first lesson and I never met someone who showed so much comfort and empathy to me, I think I even felt some bits of trust already which I also never felt before.

    Because Anxiety is really exhausting I was very tired and had a very long and tight sleep last night.

    Thinking about future lessons doesn’t make me nervous, I just can’t wait for this two weeks to be over.

  10. #10

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    I've never tried a Zoom lesson

  11. #11

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    Quote Originally Posted by SpazApproved View Post
    I've never tried a Zoom lesson
    It works great!

  12. #12

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    Default Re: Nervous about first lesson with a new teacher

    Quote Originally Posted by SpazApproved View Post
    I've never tried a Zoom lesson
    I'll be your guinea pig if you want!

    Acoustic Kits:
    Ludwig Maple 3ply White Cortex 4 pc
    Rukus Mod Orange Club 4 pc
    DW Design 6 pc
    Tama Silverstar Limited Edition Mirage 5 pc
    Tama Superstar 5 pc
    Tama Rockstar 4 pc
    Gretsch Catalina Ash 4 pc

    Slingerland 7 pc

    Electronic Kits:
    Yamaha DTX532k
    Roland TD-27, Roland PD-85 (x4), PD-125, KD9, CY-8 (x2) VH-10, Lemon 15 and 18 cymbals
    Roland SPD-SX Sample Pad

    Snares:
    Tama SLP Black Brass
    Tama SLP G Maple
    Rukus Santos/Bubinga/Poplar/Wenge
    Rukus Avodire/Maple/Mahogany
    1972 Ludwig Supraphonic


    Hardware:
    Tama, DW, Yamaha and Sonor

    Cymbals:
    Zildjian A Series, A Custom and K Custom

    Microphones:
    Miktek, Audix and Shure

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